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Lightning Fill-In-The-Blank

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer is worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Helen has 2. Faith and Bobcat each have 3.

SAGAL: All right. Helen, you're in third place. You're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. On Thursday, President Obama denied claims that the $400 million payment sent to blank constituted a ransom.

HELEN HONG: Iran.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, prominent Republican fundraiser Meg Whitman announced she was endorsing blank.

HONG: Hillary Clinton.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, President Obama commuted the sentences of 214 prisoners, many of whom were in prison for blank violations.

HONG: Drugs.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: According to a new report from the Pentagon, at least 33 service members have contracted blank while abroad.

HONG: Zika.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: To Tennessee thieves attempting to sell stolen goods at a pawnshop on Tuesday failed when blank.

HONG: They got high?

SAGAL: No - when the pawnshop clerk realized the stuff was his.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: This week, Luke Aikins became the first skydiver to successfully complete a jump without blank.

HONG: A parachute.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, the Washington state attorney general filed a $100 million lawsuit against cable company blank for deceptive practices.

HONG: Time Warner.

SAGAL: No, Comcast. After being left in a car by their owner while she ran a quick errand, two dogs in West Virginia blanked.

HONG: Broke the window themselves.

SAGAL: No, they drove the car straight into the wall of a Wal-Mart.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: In an incident that proves dogs probably want people dead just as much as cats do...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...The two animals, two dogs, which are fine, they're fine, were able to shift the car out of park and slowly inch it toward the Wal-Mart before gently crashing into the wall.

HONG: Wow.

SAGAL: Turns out dogs also look at their phones while driving.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Helen do on our quiz?

KURTIS: She got five right for 10 more points. That gives her a total of 12 and the lead.

SAGAL: All right.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So...

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: We've flipped a coin, and Faith has elected to go next, so here we go. Faith, fill in the blank. This week, President Obama said that blank was unfit for the presidency.

FAITH SALIE: Donald Trump.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, the Supreme Court temporarily blocked a ruling on blank bathroom use.

SALIE: Transgender.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, Prime Minister Shinzo Abe called blank's ballistic missile tests a grave threat to Japan.

SALIE: North Korea.

SAGAL: Of course.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After an investigation, officials in Israel say that millions of dollars in aid donated to the World Vision charity were being diverted to blank.

SALIE: Hamas.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, a group of mothers out to see the movie "Bad Moms" were kicked out of the theater for being blank.

SALIE: Oh, drunk.

SAGAL: No, for being bad moms.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: They brought a child under the age of 6 to the R-rated movie. This week, authorities reported that an illegal campfire was responsible for the wildfire currently blazing in blank.

SALIE: California.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A family in Canada was left unharmed after their camping trip was interrupted by a blank emerging from a nearby cave.

SALIE: I mean, it's not a bear, but I'm going to say bear.

SAGAL: No. It was a shirtless Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Let me tell you the story. So a man named Jim Godby was enjoying a five-day hiking trip through Quebec, and they were taking a break when Justin Trudeau, the prime minister of Canada, emerged shirtless from a cave nearby. Mr. Godby said he couldn't believe his eyes but he could identify Mr. Trudeau by his voice and also his sweet, sweet abs.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The prime minister was kind enough to take some selfies with the family before tearing apart their cooler looking for food.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Faith do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Well, she got five right, 10 more points, but she had one more going in than Helen, and that gives her 13...

SAGAL: All right.

KURTIS: ...For the lead.

SAGAL: How many, then, does Bobcat Goldthwait need to win?

(APPLAUSE)

KURTIS: Five to tie, six to win.

SAGAL: All right.

BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT: I wish Trudeau had, like, stumbled out of that cave and said, I'm the real Trudeau.

(LAUGHTER)

GOLDTHWAIT: I've been...

(LAUGHTER)

GOLDTHWAIT: I've been kidnapped.

(LAUGHTER)

GOLDTHWAIT: The man running the country is an imposter.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Here we go. This is for the game, Bobcat. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, federal agents arrested a man in North Carolina for allegedly trying to create a sleeper cell for blank.

GOLDTHWAIT: ISIS.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In an effort to battle click bait, social media site blank announced it will be adding a spam filter.

GOLDTHWAIT: Facebook.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, German supermarket giant Lidl recalled their store brand roasted peanuts because blank.

GOLDTHWAIT: They weren't nuts.

SAGAL: No because they may contain peanuts.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Claiming that the site was biased, angry fans of the new movie "Suicide Squad" petitioned to have review aggregator blank shut down.

GOLDTHWAIT: Rotten Tomatoes.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: During a live segment on Turkish TV, a reporter found what she believed to be a notebook filled with secret codes used by the plotters of the recent coup, but what she actually found was blank.

GOLDTHWAIT: A cookbook.

SAGAL: No, a notebook filled with video game cheat codes.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The reporter who found the notebook in a pile of trash pointed out to viewers that it mentioned acquiring armor, weapons and health.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: She said they must be references to the army's - nation's army and hospitals. Turns out they're just a collection of video game cheat codes. So while the coup attempt may have failed, we are happy to report that the plotters were able to successfully rescue the princess from King Koopa.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Bobcat Goldthwait do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Well, he got three right, 6 more points. His nine was an Olympic-sized attempt, but no, he could not catch Faith. She's the winner.

SAGAL: Nobody can catch Faith.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: In just a minute, we're going to ask our panelists, now that we know that flossing is a waste of time, what will be the next thing we can all stop doing?

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Special thanks to the crew at Chase Bank. BJ Leiderman composed our theme. Our program is produced by Robin Lynn and Miles Doornbos. Technical director is from Lorna White. Our CFO is Ann Nguyen. Our production coordinator Robert Neuhaus. Our senior producer is Ian Chair Boy Chillag. And the executive producer of WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME is Michael Danforth. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.